Neil Hester

All poems © Neil Hester unless otherwritten

Location: North Carolina, United States

Monday, July 30, 2007

Welcome Back, Neil!

Why, thank you! I did have an interesting trip to the Philippines; it was wonderful seeing family I've never met before, but the place itself isn't particularly pleasant. For anyone interested in a look at the Philippines, I'll have a writeup with pictures ready in the next couple weeks.

While I was in the Philippines, I decided to purchase the 7th Harry Potter book for the (32 hour) plane trip back, for I've been a fan since 4th-5th grade. It was a very exciting light read that helped shave some hours off of the hefty travel time; I am quite satisfied with the final installment. When I did get back, I realized how many people were overly praising the books or labeling it as some terrible anticulture, so here's an objective look at HP on M&C. It actually hit #1 in popularity, little credit to me: Harry Potter is bigger than YouTube, Usher, Northern Ireland, and Lindsay Lohan. Actually, if you gathered all the books in the world and piled them up, HP probably *is* bigger than all these things (that's right, N. Ireland!). Really though, I do rather enjoy reading the comments the article is attracting.

On a related side note, Jess mentioned yesterday that HP Book 5 is overwrought (which is true). I watched a J.K. Rowling interview, a fan asked if she would change anything if she could, and she said that she wishes she had done better editing on Book 5, because it's "too long". Just thought I'd mention that.

In other news, this blog is now 1 year, 1 day old. This didn't occur to me yesterday, otherwise I probably would've made this post earlier. No matter, it's not particularly important.

Notes for the past couple weeks: Creative Writing 1 from Anthony and a response from Jess. Also, Art Durkee has 4 poems up on M&C. Finally, for kicks, here's The Pachelbel Rant for all you people, especially those musicians out there. Good stuff.

Take Care,

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

To the Philippines

Well, I'm headed out for the Philippines; nothing is going to be posted here for the next 9-10 days, so don't bother checking for new entries. Seeing as to how I'm busy sorting out my affairs before I go, here's a poem:



Sensitively rendered ones are good.
And the unexpected ones as well.
I especially like bright, shiny ones.

Oftentimes I must stoop to get them.
Or grasp them out of the air.
But that's hard if it's windy.

Some graciously appear of their own right.
While others are dug out.
Pulled, stretched, or excavated.

It's the getting I'm after.

by Bruce Ario


It really is a delightful poem; what are the pickings? I've always thought that the "pickings" are ideas, but obviously I can't prove it. Great poetry often leaves certain things to personal interpretation; this poem does so poignantly, with a remarkable deal of brevity. By the way, the form "Pickings" is written in is the ario (for obvious reasons), a form that I may attempt in the near future. Anyhow, take care; I'll certainly try my best to.


Friday, July 13, 2007

parodization piece 2

before you ask any questions
let's jump straight to the poem in question and its parodic counterpart


a violent prson

is marreed 2 a changling

th changling can adapt
can sumtimez radikalee b
on her his gud side evreethings
going swimminglee sumtimez
get shit whn he she runs out
uv prsonas masks goez 2
th closet n thers nothing

hanging ther can b myself he
she thinks thn thats th feer
that th punishment will cum
fr sure if he she cant leev her
him self fast enuff breeth b
call her him n start packing

him her self is alredee enuff
is alredee fine is alredee all ther
can go now can b now she he is
sew flexibul now who 2 trust or
2 find discovr

a mountin sliding in2 th sand
sumwun who wud stay yu cud
with hold n they cud find yu they
wudint leev n yu wud bcum all
ther with them not that

thers anee all ther

th changling writes lettrs 2 her him
selvs in th ambr waves n touchinglee
with love keeps th nite

by bill bissett


maybe it's just me
but i find the whole lowercase punctuationless approach to be
rather pointless
so i wrote this


a fluffy bnny
              "Nothing you can't spell will ever work." ~Will Rogers

is marreed 2 a nibbling

th nibbling can erupt
can sumtimez comikalee b
on its its left side evreethings
chewing beautifulee sumtimez
get bit whn it it jumps out
uv rbbitheds ears goez 2
th tmples n thers pressure

th nibbling bites carrts 2 it yu
selvs in th ornge waves n crunchinglee
with food keeps th life


Whew, I think I'll jump back into a stronger coherency. Anyhow, I'd just like to say that I have no real problem with bill bissett; he's not *that* bad a poet. However, I find his "unique" style to be awfully gimmicky. More than anything, it's difficult to read; such difficulty creates a faux depth that contains little to no meaning. By the way, here's the first parodization I posted.

On a side note, Pope Benedict released a document that deems Catholicism "the only true church". What the heck? Supposedly the document is for "theological precision"; I don't buy that. Benedict is being ridiculous and anti-ecumenical. Crazy deal, isn't it?

Take Care,

Friday, July 06, 2007

The Villanette

LAEvaside: Dan contacted me to inform me that he already coined the term sonnetelle. Therefore, I have fallen back on my second name choice, villanette.


Jess: "Neil, you should write a villanelle."
Neil: "I've already written two, but they're bad."

*a few days later*

Well, here we are. I've always enjoyed messing with form, but I think this is probably the best formal innovation I've made as of now:


What Became of Madame Adelai and the Child

“May I, Madame Adelai?
May I play beneath the sky?”
“Yes, dear child, you may, you may.”

“I would like to go and play
Up there, where the birdies fly.
May I, Madame Adelai?”

I rather doubt that he would stray;
Who am I to draw a sigh?

“Yes, dear child, you may, you may.”

“Miss Adelai! I’ve gone too high!
Look at how the branches sway,
I’m scared, I’m scared, I’m gonna die!”

Miss Adelai could not reply,
For she had gone inside to pray.
“Miss Adelai! I’ve gone too high!”

The little boy could only cry
So loud. Miss Adelai had gone away.
“I’m scared, I’m scared, I’m gonna die!”

“May I, Madame Adelai?”
The boy is so polite and shy.
I pray all children, come what may
Will one day join You in the sky.

Who could have dreamt a sadder day?
“Miss Adelai! I’ve gone too high!”
Soon the little boy at play
And Adelai took to the sky.

“May I, Madame Adelai?”

There was nothing she could say.


There it is, the villanette. It's a good thing I have a blog, because this poem will probably never get published in a magazine due to the tone, despite the actual subject matter. Anyhow, I suppose I'll break this thing down (I'd love to see a few people try one [Anthony? Whinza? Jess?]).


the villanette- 28 lines; 6 tercets, 2 quatrains, 1 couplet







A1 (or A2/a)
a (or A1/A2)

B1 (or B2/b)
b (or B1/B2)



It starts as a regular villanelle, then switches the base lines to "b" in the 4th tercet. After the sixth tercet, it switches into two quatrains and a couplet to end like a sonnet (and with 28 lines, the length of two sonnets). Jess described the form as "whimsical"; I agree, as it was on whimsical impulse that I veered from writing a normal villanelle and did this instead.

In other news, a couple articles: "Why I Hate Poetry Magazine" from The Angry Critic, and "Let's Eliminate High School" from Joe Reese (thank you, Joe!).

Take Care,

Monday, July 02, 2007


Looks like July is here; unfortunately, unlike the last three months, July doesn't directly translate into a female name (though Julie is awfully close). Regardless, let's look into July and see what we (well, I, really) come up with:


  • July was renamed for Julius Caesar, who was born in that month. Previously, it was called Quintilis in Latin.
  • Independence Day in the United States, Venezuela, and Malawi occur consecutively (July 4th, 5th, and 6th, respectively).
  • July is National Ice Cream Month in the United States.
  • In Finnish, the month is called heinäkuu, meaning "month of grass".
  • July begins on the same day of the week as April every year and also January in leap years.
  • July's flower is the water lily or larkspur.
  • July is the most common birth month, along with October.

If you live in the U.S., it's almost time for fireworks, which I always enjoy (I doubt the pleasure of bright lights and loud bangs ever truly fades). Now, without further ado:



Julie and Julian met in July.
Now they’re a pair; noone ever asks why.


Alright, new record! One-minute poems are so cool.

Take Care,